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ACCIDENTAL SPOUSE - WHEN TO RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

FAMILY LIFE TODAY with PF

 

ACCIDENTAL SPOUSE – 19– RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

 

The best place to stop an intruder is at the gate and not when you have served him dinner inside your bedroom

One of my mentors once told me that there are two ways to kill a lion – either you engage it in a combat and kill it if you are lucky just that you may have a few scars if you are strong enough. But there is another way which is to avoid a lion because a lion will naturally die for lack of prey. 

Too many times accidental spouses show signs and other times they even have a huge bill board with warning signs. Unfortunately, the passengers never read the warning signs because they are too much in love to see.

Here are some warning signs that shows when to run;

  • When you are seeing someone, who tells you he/she doesn’t believe he/she has to be accountable to any human being and goes further to say he is only accountable to God – RUN
  • When he/she says marriage is...
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IS YOUR SPOUSE ACCOUNTABLE?

FAMILY LIFE TODAY with PF

ACCIDENTAL SPOUSE – 18– WHO ARE YOU ACCOUNTABLE TO?

“A body of men holding themselves accountable to nobody ought not to be trusted by anybody.” 
― Thomas Paine

The fourth attribute of accidental spouse is  lack of accountability.

One consistent advice I have given to singles all through the years is never get married to a guy/lady who is not accountable or has got no mentor or someome he/she defers to because we are not built to be independent.

“Power corrupt and absolute power corrupt absolutely” this is why it is characteristic of military heads of states to run a tyrannical government because they have absolute powers. Everyone needs that one person in his/her life that can call him/her to order and the absence of that figure can spell doom for a man.

There must be someone in your life you respect enough to obey even when you are not sure of what he/she is saying. Unfortunately, lots of married...

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ACCIDENTAL SPOUSES & MARITAL ASSUMPTION

FAMILY LIFE TODAY with PF

ACCIDENTAL SPOUSE – 16 – NEVER ASSUME MARRIAGE

I sit over domestic violence cases consistently and one common pattern I have noticed is the unequal yoke of the couples each time we run their beliefs assessment tests. The gap is often too wide that you knew they should never have married if the right things had been done in their marital preparatory class if there was any to start with.

Consistently a man whose definition of manhood is the superior gender that must be worshipped irrespective of his wisdom and competence marries a woman whose definition of a womanhood is the feminine expression of humanity(where manhood to her is defined as humanity).

How can these two live together successfully without any friction?

Assumption and lack of uniform definition of concepts and terms can totally destroy the joy of marriage that the two become a major accident waiting to happen. That is why beliefs alignment becomes critical in every marriage and this...

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Help! My Marital beliefs is killing me

FAMILY LIFE TODAY with PF

 

ACCIDENTAL SPOUSE – 15 – THE TRAJECTORY OF ERROR?

I usually would play a game in most of my classes by asking my students to write down something they are so sure of. I’d then ask the class to troubleshoot the belief with them to be sure it was their personal discovery or if they ever studied or questioned it before they accepted it. In 7 out of every 10 they usually discover their beliefs were borrowed beliefs.

More shocking for almost all the participants is the realization that not one of them every took out time to study simple everyday concepts like;

  • Who is a man vs woman?
  • What does husband or wife mean?
  • What is heaven or hell?
  • Who is a father or mother?
  • What is parenting?
  • Why did God make man?
  • What is marriage?

As you read this you may want to ask yourself the same question and if you can be honest with yourself I will appreciate your feedback. Have you ever took out time independently to study any of the above concepts...

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WHOSE IDEA ARE YOU?

family marriage Mar 03, 2021

FAMILY LIFE TODAY with PF

ACCIDENTAL SPOUSE – 14 – WHOSE IDEA ARE YOU?

The most loving parents and relatives commit murder with smiles on their faces. They force us to destroy the person we really are. A subtle kind of murder – Jim Morrison

A few years ago I started to question everything around me and within me because I was bent on getting the desired results in specific areas of my life. I had been thought too many things that was not working and I had completely forgotten that what I held unto for too long were learned behavior that I either picked by observation or by acquired knowledge. Most of the things I held unto were not beliefs I had questioned because I was not even given the chance to question them before I was socialized to believe them.

 The moment I started to question them it dawned on me how much I had learnt and become convinced about that had nothing to do with me. For example, I could be easily excused for getting married and expecting...

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