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Help! My Marital beliefs is killing me

family marriage marriage and family life singles Mar 04, 2021




I usually would play a game in most of my classes by asking my students to write down something they are so sure of. I’d then ask the class to troubleshoot the belief with them to be sure it was their personal discovery or if they ever studied or questioned it before they accepted it. In 7 out of every 10 they usually discover their beliefs were borrowed beliefs.

More shocking for almost all the participants is the realization that not one of them every took out time to study simple everyday concepts like;

  • Who is a man vs woman?
  • What does husband or wife mean?
  • What is heaven or hell?
  • Who is a father or mother?
  • What is parenting?
  • Why did God make man?
  • What is marriage?

As you read this you may want to ask yourself the same question and if you can be honest with yourself I will appreciate your feedback. Have you ever took out time independently to study any of the above concepts starting from the etymological perspective of things?

When the truth about a concept or a belief is not discovered a generational error from the mouth of someone well loved or respected may be passed from one generation to another and a simple English word not properly understood takes on another meaning that holds people bound. Isn’t that why a cat is a pet and part of a family elsewhere while it is a witch in some other clime.

There are basically 4 sources of beliefs

  • Observation
  • Acquired knowledge
  • Revelation which is a product of either an indepth research or meditation
  • Invasion which is at first an epiphany.

Any belief that doesn’t promote the best interest of the two people involved in a marital relationship no matter how long it has been accepted could be a self sabotaging belief borne out of error or a once upon a time truth created out of limited exposure that has outlived its usefulness.

 To be continued  

 You can now book for any of my coaching programs with your spouses here

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